{"id":20610,"date":"2017-12-29T13:18:32","date_gmt":"2017-12-29T18:18:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.runkevinrun.com\/?p=20610"},"modified":"2017-12-29T13:18:32","modified_gmt":"2017-12-29T18:18:32","slug":"the-twenty-cent-failure","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/runkevinrun.com\/?p=20610","title":{"rendered":"The Twenty Cent Failure"},"content":{"rendered":"

This day just keeps getting worse and worse.<\/p>\n

I went to Wal-Mart for one thing (albeit I had a list of other things but they were just because I was going). And I got everything on the list… except the one thing I went there for in the first place. I’m lethargic and a mess and 25 pounds overweight and I thought maybe a daily multivitamin might help to try and jumpstart the old body that is ever-more breaking down and creaking and rusting and just generally decaying before my eyes. I’m feeling old, fat, and forgetful.<\/p>\n

Would that I would forget I was old and fat. Now that would be something.<\/p>\n

I did remember on my shopping trip to buy a wooden dowel. You see, I need to fix my elephant ears.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

What? Your elephant ears don’t flop around on you? They just fit. Must be nice. But when you’re trying to run a 5K at Walt Disney World next week by channeling your inner Dumbo, believe me, the ears matter.<\/p>\n

I thought this 20 cent dowel safety pinned to the ears would enable a proper “flop.”\u00a0 But sadly it was just a flop… full stop.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Sigh. Back to the drawing board.<\/p>\n

Twenty cents wasted!<\/p>\n

I might as well have thrown two dimes into the sewer. Or a dime and two nickels… three coins… into a fountain. I’d have had a better result I’m sure.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

This day just keeps getting worse and worse. I went to Wal-Mart for one thing (albeit I had a list of other things but they were just because I was going). And I got everything on the list… except the one thing I went there for in the first place. I’m lethargic and a mess […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-20610","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/runkevinrun.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20610","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/runkevinrun.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/runkevinrun.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runkevinrun.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runkevinrun.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=20610"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/runkevinrun.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20610\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/runkevinrun.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=20610"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runkevinrun.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=20610"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runkevinrun.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=20610"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}