{"id":24204,"date":"2018-04-17T02:28:51","date_gmt":"2018-04-17T06:28:51","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.runkevinrun.com\/?p=24204"},"modified":"2018-04-17T02:28:51","modified_gmt":"2018-04-17T06:28:51","slug":"the-122nd-boston-marathon-april-16-2018","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/runkevinrun.com\/?p=24204","title":{"rendered":"The 122nd Boston Marathon \u2013 April 16, 2018"},"content":{"rendered":"

There\u2019s a moment in Mel Brooks\u2019 The Producers when Gene Wilder as Leo Bloom<\/strong> is hysterically ranting and raving and Zero Mostel’s Max Bialystock <\/strong>throws a glass of water on him.<\/p>\n

BLOOM
\nI’m wet!\u00a0 I’m wet!\u00a0 I’m hysterical and I’m wet!<\/p>\n

BIALYSTOCK IN A DESPERATE MOVE TO STOP BLOOM’S HYSTERICS, SLAPS HIM ACROSS THE FACE.<\/p>\n

BLOOM
\n(holding his face)
\nI’m in pain!\u00a0 And I’m wet!\u00a0 And I’m still hysterical!<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

That\u2019s kinda how I felt throughout the 122nd<\/sup> Boston Marathon.<\/p>\n

In order to get to the Hopkinton, the start of the 26.2 mile course to Boyleston Street\u2019s finish in Boston, I first had to get to the Common.\u00a0 It\u2019s just slightly too far to walk from my AirBNB to the Shawmut T station but I did it this morning at 5 AM.\u00a0 In the rain.\u00a0 And the wind.\u00a0 And the cold.\u00a0 It would be at varying degrees of intensity of those three elements throughout the run, and never to a null set that might have resulted in an \u201coh, what a pleasant day to be running!\u201d environment.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a>\u00a0 \"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Upon arriving at Athletes\u2019 Village in Hopkinton, I experienced what was a Woodstock light \u2013 a field wih all the mud but none of the free love, bad acid, and rock \u2018n\u2019 roll bands.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Unlike last year\u2019s amble and shuffle about for photos and memories, I mainly hung out inside Tent # 2, downing a hot chocolate and then refilling my glass with hot water to serve as a kind of hand warmer.\u00a0 Outside the tent, the rain fell and now and again a gust of wind would rip through the area, sending collected pockets of water on the tarpaulin material cascading down in a flash flood.<\/p>\n

\"\" <\/a><\/p>\n

And this is what we were going to be running in.<\/p>\n

And this is what I paid to do with my Monday.<\/p>\n

Swell.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

I was lucky enough to have qualified in the first wave of runners, meaning I got to make the long walk to the starting corrals beginning at 9:15 AM.<\/p>\n

We were all in this together, runners braving the wild \u201cspring\u201d weather.\u00a0 This is Angela, a Canadian runner who I happened to snap a photo with as we waited to head out.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

She was kind enough to snap a photo of me… but I kinda wish she hadn’t as I look ridiculously fat.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

I can blame the clothes but that\u2019s only part of it. \u00a0There are a number of photos here where my face looks like the balloon artist overfilled the latex and I have that bloated, bursting at the seams chubby face that is\u00a0anti-chiseled,\u00a0more Buddha than Greek mythology. \u00a0I could blame the cold and rain for somehow distorting the image, as if a raindrop on the lens created a funhouse effect. \u00a0But that would be disingenuous spin on an all too verifiable truth.<\/p>\n

I mean look at this – I look like Satchmo and Sasquatch were genetically combined in CRISPR.<\/a><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Sorry… sorry. \u00a0I recently saw RAMPAGE, the Dwayne Johnson monster disaster pic that\u2019s the most Uwe Boll movie not directed by Uwe Boll. \u00a0So not only am I sorry for that CRISPR reference, I\u2019m incredibly sorry I saw RAMPAGE.
\nBut I digress…<\/p>\n

I stripped off my less than $3 sweat pants, which fit me as they would a circus clown, baggy and comically unflattering.\u00a0 Despite the wind and the rain and the cold, I couldn\u2019t see trying to run in them; I would\u2019ve been more at home in a 1980s Los Angeles gang with my pants dragging down at my ankles.\u00a0 I kept my $6 GapFit shirt on as it had my bib pinned to it and I hoped it would provide a modicum of warmth in the coming miles.\u00a0 But size wise it might as well have been a circus tent on me as it only seemed to make me seem extra plump and ungainly.\u00a0 Fat is the word I might use.\u00a0 God, I hate how I look in these clothes\u2026 and I try and tell myself that it was a necessity as the invention of Eddie Murphy Nutty Professor-ian proportions but, ugh, I really, really, REALLY hate the few stray photos of me in these things.\u00a0 Given that I never doffed that GapFit shirt throughout the run, one can only assume the official MarathonFoto pics, for which I pre-paid $60 for, will highlight the girth and not the accomplishment of the day.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a> \"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Those MarathonFotos though, however they may turn out, will be the only photos of me on the course.\u00a0 Due to my frozen extremities, I couldn\u2019t get my iPhone out of my pocket to snap shots even once over the 26.2 miles\u2026 not even at mile 23 when Meg was cheering me on.\u00a0 But to be honest, a friendly face and warm hug at that moment was more important than anything else and she helped inspire me onto the finish.\u00a0 So, thanks, Meg.<\/p>\n

I was able to get back to my AirBNB and grab a shower before a mad dash Lyft to the airport.\u00a0 I\u2019m sitting on the plane winging my way to the West Coast to catch a flight to Nepal and I thought maybe I\u2019d do a rolling recap of the stray thoughts that went through my brain during the marathon.\u00a0 This obviously isn\u2019t contemporaneous as I wasn\u2019t dictating my thoughts as they happened\u2026 but it\u2019s contemporaneous adjacent as I finished the race roughly seven hours ago.<\/p>\n

So here goes:<\/p>\n

Gosh darnit!\u00a0 This cold is miserable.\u00a0 And this wind is even miserabler.\u00a0 A least I\u2019m in good company; all of us runners are enduring the conditions.\u00a0 Nope, nope.\u00a0 Screw that.\u00a0 I\u2019m just miserable.<\/em><\/p>\n

Should I quit?\u00a0 There\u2019s a med tent.\u00a0 They\u2019d probably drive me back to Boston.<\/em><\/p>\n

Man, maybe that Rosie Ruiz was on to something\u2026.<\/em><\/p>\n

The one time I quit a race in media res, it was going to take them so long to evac me to the finish that I wound up dropping back IN (see Ventura Marathon 2017).<\/em><\/p>\n

I can\u2019t quit.\u00a0 But ye gods do I want to.<\/em><\/p>\n

Oh, good gravy, Marie!\u00a0 That wind just cuts to the bone\u2026 and the rain smacks me in the face like a thousand tiny needles.\u00a0 It\u2019s as if I were using that Spencer Gifts era PIN THING but not just long enough to make some goofy metallic punk art; it\u2019s like all the time.\u00a0 All.\u00a0 The.\u00a0 Time.<\/em><\/p>\n

The girls of Wellesley were out in full force just before mile 13.\u00a0 There\u2019s a tradition of kissing that I bypassed in favor of high-fiving\u2026 not because there weren\u2019t several women puckering but with the inertia of the field of runners there wasn\u2019t a safe way to stop and properly lock lips.\u00a0 If a kiss is worth doing, it\u2019s worth doing right.<\/em><\/p>\n

I have long wanted to find a more mature Wellesley alum (or more mature undergrad) to kiss along the way but I always hesitate.\u00a0 What if this goes horribly wrong?\u00a0 What if she\u2019s taken aback or unwilling and slaps me with her purse, decrying me as a \u201cmasher?\u201d\u00a0 In the current #meToo movement I was even more cognizant of potentially unwanted \u201cadvances\u201d so despite being tempted to rush over and kiss a lady I opted not to.\u00a0 For the record, that does NOT make me an enlightened male worthy of praise.\u00a0 If anything, the fact that I was thinking about an untoward sexual harassment is indicative of how far we still have to go.<\/em><\/p>\n

Overall the spectators and volunteers were small but mighty.\u00a0 I\u2019m always impressed with folks who come out and cheer in the best of days \u2013 while we runners get to see the sights, those working the aid stations or cheering us on are stuck in one place for far too long.\u00a0 The few times I\u2019ve tried to see people racing, it\u2019s always been way more stressful and difficult than logging the miles on the road.\u00a0 So a tip of the hat to folks out there on any given day and a SPECIAL low to the ground kotow bow to those folks out there in weather like we had today.\u00a0 In Wayne Campbell and Garth Ancier speak, \u201cWe\u2019re not worthy!\u00a0 We\u2019re not worthy!\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

This $2 Spider-Man hat I bought from Goodwill on a whim has really paid off in spectator comments. I guess as IP goes, it\u2019s recognizable and popular.\u00a0 But a lot of street corners were reverberating with cries of, \u201cGo, Spidey!\u201d and \u201cWe love you, Spider-Man!\u201d and \u201cYou got this, Spider-Man.\u201d\u00a0 Plus, I found the vague double entendre \u201cMy spidey-sense is tingling!\u00a0 Kiss me, Spider-Man!\u201d that was shouted by a Wellesley girl way more palatable than her neighbor\u2019s sign that read, \u201cKiss me\u2026 I\u2019m already wet.\u201d\u00a0 Stay classy, Wellesley.\u00a0 Stay classy.<\/em><\/p>\n

Heartbreak Hill in the early 20 miles range is always anti-climactic.\u00a0 Even in my 2012 \u201cvirgin\u201d Boston experience I was oddly underwhelmed by the challenge.\u00a0 Yeah, it\u2019s a hill.\u00a0 And yeah it comes fairly late in the course.\u00a0 But it\u2019s not that bad.\u00a0 There are way worse challenges it seems to me on this course\u2026 especially on a day like today.\u00a0 I slowed, to be sure, as I often do when running up a hill.\u00a0 But when I got to the top and folks were congratulating me on conquering \u201cheartbreak\u201d I wanted to tell them there\u2019s other far more devastating and debilitating heartbreaks in life that I\u2019m not sure I\u2019ve conquered so this hill is perhaps not that big of a deal.\u00a0 I\u2019m glad to not be running up it anymore, sure, but, ya know, as the kids say, \u201cwhateves.\u201d\u00a0 Do they still say \u201cwhateves?\u201d\u00a0 If not, I\u2019m saying, \u201cwhateves.\u201d\u00a0 It\u2019s the new \u201cfetch.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Passing the Citgo sign with one mile to go, I realize as I gaze at the clock time that even though I\u2019m not 100% sure what the differential is between clock time and my chip time, I\u2019m not going to BQ at Boston.\u00a0 I wanted to.\u00a0 I thought it would be a nice way to cap what is looking ever more like my last unicorn run with the BAA.\u00a0 But unless it took me more than 6 minutes to cross the starting mat (and that seems VERY unlikely), I\u2019m not going to pull that off.\u00a0 Whether it\u2019s the wind, the cold, the miles, the years, or some combination I\u2019m not entirely sure (actually I am\u2026 it\u2019s a combination of a lot of things), but I am entirely sure that the clock keeps ticking and I\u2019m passed the BQ cut-off.\u00a0 Nonetheless, I\u2019m persisting and pushing through the pain, the exhaustion, the rain, the wind\u2026 and as I turn into the home stretch on Boyleston, the crowd roars\u2026 not just for me but for all the runners who are so close to being done.<\/em><\/p>\n

Actually, no, a lot is for me.\u00a0 There aren\u2019t a lot of Spider-Men out on the course being cheered on by name.<\/em><\/p>\n

Go, Spidey, go.\u00a0 Run, Kevin, run.<\/em><\/p>\n

The Finish Line Selfie Photo:<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

There\u2019s a moment in Mel Brooks\u2019 The Producers when Gene Wilder as Leo Bloom is hysterically ranting and raving and Zero Mostel’s Max Bialystock throws a glass of water on him. BLOOM I’m wet!\u00a0 I’m wet!\u00a0 I’m hysterical and I’m wet! BIALYSTOCK IN A DESPERATE MOVE TO STOP BLOOM’S HYSTERICS, SLAPS HIM ACROSS THE FACE. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-24204","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/runkevinrun.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24204","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/runkevinrun.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/runkevinrun.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runkevinrun.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runkevinrun.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=24204"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/runkevinrun.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24204\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/runkevinrun.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=24204"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runkevinrun.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=24204"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runkevinrun.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=24204"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}