I neglected to include this in yesterday\u2019s recap of the New River Marathon.<\/p>\n
This is a horror story.<\/p>\n
Along the river in that land of North Carolina, there are wildflowers.\u00a0 And amongst the North Carolina wildflowers are bumble bees.\u00a0 And amidst my sweat and fatigue, the bumble bees decided I smelled sweeter than the flowers down low.<\/p>\n
And so as I clomped along, the bees buzzed about me.<\/p>\n
Bzzzzzz.<\/p>\n
Bzzzzzz.<\/p>\n
BZZZZZZZzzzzzzz.<\/p>\n
I\u2019d swat my hands, trying to send the bees a flyin\u2019.<\/p>\n
They\u2019d only regroup, like biplanes swirling an oversized ape atop the Empire State Building.<\/p>\n
Bees to the left of me.\u00a0 Bees to the right.<\/p>\n
Up and down.\u00a0 All around.\u00a0 Bees, bees, bees.<\/p>\n
I\u2019d wobble from the flowered edge to the center line of the narrow road\u2026 but those damn bees just kept a coming.<\/p>\n
Bumble bees don\u2019t often sting\u2026 but they unceasingly sing.\u00a0 They sing a song of buzzy buzz buzzing that annoyed and taunted me.\u00a0 A song in the key of B major\u2026 as in bee majorly buzzing.<\/p>\n
And as they sung, those bumble bees sought to take five in my hair.\u00a0 To these bees, my finger slicked hair was more 60s beehive than 2018 runner.<\/p>\n
I\u2019d shake my head, run my fingers through my follicles and the bees would take flight \u2026 only to alight once more amongst my greying and thinning pompadour.<\/p>\n
Bzzzzzzzzz.<\/p>\n
Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.<\/p>\n
BZZZZZZZzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZ.<\/p>\n
Even at this moment, days removed from the wilds of Boone, NC, I feel them flitting about my head.<\/p>\n
I hear them in my head.<\/p>\n
The buzzing of their wings.\u00a0 The bumbling of their bee-ing.<\/p>\n
I admit the deed!\u00a0 Tear out my hair!\u00a0 It\u2019s the beating of their hideous hides!<\/p>\n