Today my feet are still hurting but I’m trying a new insole to address that.\u00a0 Adhering to the age old adage that one should never do anything new on race day, I’m doing something new on the day BEFORE race day.\u00a0 So this should all work out fine.<\/p>\n
I’m feeling better than I have been… and I’ve told myself if it hurts too much I will drop out… no matter how hard it is personally or logistically<\/a>.<\/p>\n A flood of memories overtook me as I went about town today.\u00a0 I guess they were more like flashes than fully formed memories but it is odd to reflect back on that time.\u00a0 That’s where the B-52s played the finisher fest.\u00a0 That’s the hotel I stayed at.\u00a0 That’s where I lay in the grass after finishing and made phone calls on my VirginMobile Pay-As-You-Go cell.<\/p>\n The clearest memory I have though is at the pasta feed on race eve.\u00a0 They no longer have that in 2019, but in 2004 I recall this volunteer dancing to Hey Ya<\/a>.\u00a0 She was “the girl next door” who just exuded fun and optimism, a woman who pulled up white haired “old” people (people who were at the time probably my age now) to dance with her, having them “shake it like a Polaroid picture.”\u00a0 I only saw her for a few moments but I will always remember her as somebody who could light up a room, who tried to make things better for others.\u00a0 It’s a testament to the notion that the world is vast and we may never know what we have done for others.\u00a0 That woman is 15 years older, probably is married with kids, or off on a mountain climbing adventure with her friends, or solving some mathematical dilemma that could change the course of humankind… whatever she’s doing, I hope she’s happy and still dancing.\u00a0 Because though the world is vast, it is also harsh and can lead even the most optimistic down a cynical path.<\/p>\n I pulled some old photos from circa April 2004 to post here.\u00a0 I figure I’ll wait until tomorrow to do a kind of before and after for the run.\u00a0 But seeing myself so far removed… it’s not always easy.\u00a0 But then again neither is 26.2 miles.<\/p>\n ***<\/p>\n On my flight out here I sat next to a guy coming to SLC for a fencing tournament.\u00a0 It was being held in the same place as the race expo, so I stopped by to see how he was doing.\u00a0 He had advanced… but he told me everybody did.\u00a0 Not sure how that works but so be it.\u00a0 Here he is getting ready to match epees at mat E1.<\/p>\n I headed to the expo and was underwhelmed.\u00a0 It all seemed so much more… impressive <\/em>in 2004.\u00a0 Perhaps it’s the difference between being a wide-eyed neophyte and a wearied veteran.<\/p>\n Another memory flash — I was riding the SLC metro in 2004 with other runners to get to the start line.\u00a0 I was nervously fidgety, never having run 26.2 miles.\u00a0 These two guys were talking about their prior races and claimed they couldn’t remember how many they’d done.\u00a0 I thought that was crazy – how could you ever forget running 26.2 miles?\u00a0 And yet, here I am trying to think of all the races I’ve run.\u00a0 The student has become the forgetful fool.\u00a0 In oh so many ways.<\/p>\n I wonder if I’ll finish tomorrow.\u00a0 I know I will at least start… and in some small way that feels like a victory unto itself.\u00a0 I’m way out of shape, injured, not having run for 3 weeks, 25 pounds over my goal weight for easing stress on my body and its frame.\u00a0 But as the fencer guy said to me on the flight – it’s all about focus.\u00a0 But then again he also told me he voted for Trump, so I’m taking that with a grain of salt.\u00a0 Apropos I think given the town I’m in.<\/p>\n Anyhoo, here’s the thing.\u00a0 I remember uncertainty at running a marathon in 2004.\u00a0 And in 2019, there’s uncertainty I’ll run a marathon.\u00a0 Maybe time is a circle and all that has happened will just happen again.\u00a0 Is that optimism or pessimism personified?\u00a0 I wish that girl was here holding a copy of Outkast’s cass-single in her pocket and the other hand offering me to join her dancing.<\/p>\n ***<\/p>\n The ’04 and ’19 “day before race day”:<\/p>\n![\"\"](\"http:\/\/www.runkevinrun.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/20190412_103256-300x225.jpg\")
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